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last updated 10.5.02
note from the webmistress:
for some reason, i feel the need to explain my perfect guy list here. every point
on my list has a reason that it's there. some people think all of it
is purely superficial, or that it's ridiculous and impossible to list
point-by-point requirements. on the contrary, very few of my
"requirements" are superficial, and all of the points have been
carefully thought through. you will see my thought process below.
in a healthy relationship, both parties learn from and grow with each
other. of course, both want to move in a positive direction. what i
have to offer a relationship is another story (this isn't bachelorette
- you'll have to figure it out yourself), but this list mostly covers
what i think would "complete" me.
my perfect guy:
- makes me happy and has a good sense of humor
of course, it is important that your significant other makes you
happy. laughing burns calories, and makes you live longer. plus,
everyone needs to hear my "fat lady laugh". a "good sense of humor,"
or rather a similar sense of humor to mine, in my opinion, is
extremely important - you don't want one of you to make a joke, and
then the other person to sit there and go... ummm... ha.
- is 5'11 or taller, 2-5 years older than me, and has nice teeth
this is purely superficial. it's what appeals to me. it's been a
general trend that i noticed in guys that i'm attracted to. that's
all.
- is clean clean, very clean - messy is ok, but dirty is not
i am a very clean person, and bacteria scares me. :) my whole family
is like this. i once got caught sharing a drink with a friend, and my
family just about disowned me. messiness can be cleaned up - i can
clean it, or i can yell. if someone can tolerate living in filth,
that is just plain disgusting. someone like that would not work well
with me.
- doesn't mind scratching my back - and i'm talking like every
night here :)
if i could have one person to do something for me... anything... a
driver, a cook, a secretary, a masseuse, whatever... i would have
someone follow me around and scratch my back when i say to. *ooooh.*
:) just one of my quirks.
- is trustworthy - can be counted on for anything (when he says
he'll do something, you know he will). the "go-to" guy. the
alpha.
you don't ever want to doubt that someone is really going to do what
they say they will. i really value this trait in a person. alphas
are like rocks - strong, everlasting, and rock-hard. makes me feel
safe.
- is patient and persistent
because i am very impatient, i need someone who will counter-balance
that. patience is a virtue. people with bad tempers scare me - it's
simply not going to work. i'm a scorpio. rawr.
- has good manners (especially around my parents) :)
i was raised to have good manners (at least in front of other people's
parents... hehe) - respect! :) maybe it's the last little bit of
chinese in me. isn't it great when all parts of your life just fit
together nicely? i've seen and experienced relationships where the
parents are disapproving, and it's just not pretty.
- knows what's going on in the world (reads the news)
i think we can all agree that this is important. living in a bubble
is bad. there is a whole world out there.
- doesn't smoke cigarettes (not even *socially*)
ask the surgeon general - smoking does bad things to your body. yes,
we're all going to die of something, but there are much better things
to die of. even after my year-long stint in germany, i still don't
smoke. smelly icky poo.
- is an "expert" at something
i think this is a great acheivement for a person to have, and that it
will naturally come with time, persistence, and hard work. those are
really the qualities that i'm getting at here. to me, brains are the
most attractive part of a person.
- likes to go out/plan outings
i like to go out - not all of the time, but sometimes. i want to be
able to go out with my guy and not feel like i'm dragging him out. we
also both need time to go out with our own friends too... it's not
good when one person goes out and the other one stays at home all the
time. it'd also be nice if once in a while he's plan a thing or two
for us to do together. :) tee hee.
- athletic
even though i'm quite the sloth nowadays, i used to play a lot of
sports. i started playing volleyball and basketball in 4th grade, and
in high school i played them both, along with badminton. i even
played club volleyball outside of school, during basketball season.
in college, i played badminton for the cal team (go bears!) and did a
little tae kwon do. i like sports - if my lifestyle permitted, i'd do
a lot more. this is a hobby/interest-matching point, as well as a
health factor.
take off 10 points for:
- tardiness - one of my hugest pet peeves (even though i'm often
guilty of it)
this is a result of my impatience. i think it's also rude to make
someone wait.
- talking excessively about ex-girlfriends
there is a time for talking about ex-es, but it's not *all* of the
time. it's not casually in a normal conversation. it's not good if
he is comparing the ex to me. and it's especially not good during a
romantic moment. blech. it's not that i'm jealous or afraid that
he'll go back to her, but more that she shouldn't have a part in his
foremost thoughts anymore. at least it's that way for me - who knows,
maybe guys are different, but still - i don't want to hear it.
- yawning when he talks to me on the phone
what are you saying by doing this? "i'm too tired to talk to you." or
"you're boring." then call me after you take a nap.
- no sense of direction (because i have none)
it's true. i have no sense of direction. i am really really good
when it comes to getting to/from shopping for some reason, but other
than that i almost always point in the wrong direction. i'm like an
inverse compass. :D
maybe someday i'll explain the points on page 2. :)
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